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15. Neil Gaiman

Neil, Neil, Neil. There was a time when we thought you were hot, with your vaguely Semitic good looks, your all-black attire, your poofy hair. Of course, that was in the 1990s, when people also though Lobo was cutting-edge parody. But then you met Amanda Palmer, and your voyage into unsexiness truly began. We know you've always longed for a punk rock chick with torn stockings and unshaven pits to call your own, but your mutual obsession has really started to grate. It's creepy. Okay? You're no longer individuals, you're Gaimanda. And, frankly, we don't appreciate her stripping down so you could sketch her at the MFA, either. Now we have to wash that whole gallery.
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