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Yeah, Bruno Mars is so unsexy, right?
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46. Bruno Mars

The Michael-Jackson-esque vocal tics, the Zamfir-tastic atmospherics, the saccharine lyrics: it’s a complete package. Every tune Mr. Mars "writes" sounds like he's selling a cell-phone plan — or castration services. Besides, what sort of soulless cheeseball would try to pull off a pompadour without pomade? The same one who would turn a Jersey Shore term for ugly chicks into a mega-hit love-song title. Bet he waxes his balls.
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